Um, they had me at hell no. I mean, even if one does have use of thirty used toilet seats, can the owner really make someone take the ones with brown stains that can't be removed?? I don't even want to think about it in too much detail. Not even the obsessive cleaner in me wants to go there.
That said, it's the wild-card nature of Craigslist that makes me love it so. I relish not only the great scores but also the whackadoodle-ness that goes on there too. Not since I read this in the "lost and found" section have I enjoyed an ad so much:
"I found a variety of cheeses in the North Nashville area. The cheeses were haphazardly strewn in a large, misshapen pail of some sort. The labels appear to be written in French, Italian, Latin or Aramaic (all I know is that it's not English!). Be prepared to describe this make-shift cornucopia of cheeses, so that I know that you are in fact the rightful owner. Please hurry, as one in particular is quite pungent, and possibly making my cat very upset with me."
That's right people. The cat is NOT amused. Which makes me realize that I never asked my cats what they think about the opportunity for us to snag thirty used toilet seats. They might just find it a formidable opportunity! But alas, at the time of this post, neither my calls to the offices of Sobu or Mishka have been returned. Though I reached Pip, she refused to comment.
In fact, it's a great morning for Craigslist in Nashville. Not only can a person score all of those used seats but they can also swing by and pick up this at no-cost:
Gag gift. Sure. Yep. That's what I say about that giant pair of granny panties that are floating around in my dryer. We all know the deal. And in an especially bold move, the owner of said product posted her name and phone number. Oh, Hillary!
Within minutes, this response was posted from a good Samaritan:
What the? If this has happened to me once, it's happened a thousand times! Within the hour, Hillary posted this:
She updated her post to read "Serious Users Only". Sounds like she's received quite a few prank phone calls from her ad. I mean, in all seriousness, who among us (if burdened with the gift of a sex swing, say at a bridal shower or Bat Mitzvah) wouldn't just donate it to a thrift store or re-gift it at the office during the holiday "Dirty Santa" gift swap? (Am I the only one who has always wondered why it's called "Dirty Santa" when the gifts inevitably turn out to be scented candles and cheese samplers? Why not mix things up a bit? Those fuzzy handcuffs too tight? Surely Hal from Human Resources can use them!)
Would one really consider listing an item of this ilk right along with other free stuff like used couches, baby food jars and chicken coops? Listen people, I am a Craigslist troller and I'll be the first to say that some of the people who have come to my house to pick up innocent things have turned out to be pretty creepy. You gonna list a sex swing and think that your day will be without incident?
I'm sure that this high drama will continue for a while so I'll keep my eye on it. Oh no, no need to thank me. And hello! to you new readers who landed here from internet searches due to my excessive use of the term "sex swing". I can promise you that I am a dirty, dirty girl. Just read yesterday's toilet post to prove it.
This post actually reminds me of the time a few years ago when someone stole my check card. I went to the bank to learn that yo, yo, yo! I didn't have any money in my account. I was the victim of a hotel reservations agent who had decided to run willy-nilly from pillar to post purchasing the following: cat toys, craft supplies, sex swings and diamonds. Yep. Cat toys, craft supplies, sex swings and diamonds. Sound familiar? That's right. I'm pretty sure that Maria sang about them in that song from The Sound of Music about favorite things - right after doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles.
I really have no good ending for this post except to say that I really don't think that I'll be picking up any free items from Craigslist today. And I think that I've done my share of toilet posts for a while. You and the cats don't have to worry.
Until next time (remember.. sometimes, not even Clorox wipes will make it right)
x's and o's,