Thursday, April 18, 2013

What's Going Down At The Ranch

I know that like me, you're more than likely feeling a little shaken from the news of the last week. You're probably also like me in that you want to hold your loved ones just a little bit closer. I just learned that my brother and his family had a fire in their house today. Thankfully they were home and caught it in time so they are okay. If it had been during the night or when they were away, things could have been truly tragic. I know that my family is feeling fortunate that things happened like they did.

Big ole storm clouds are brewing tonight so I've got to clean out that danged Christmas closet in the hall again. For lack of a better place, it's our makeshift tornado shelter. I think that I spend more time with those decorations during tornado season than I do at Christmas! My next house is going to have a basement storm shelter, mark my word. And every time that we take to the closet, I swear that I'm going to buy another scooter helmet. Back story: Okay, so the Mister is from Kansas where the mighty winds come whistling through the plains quite often so he's not scared of tornadoes. But me? I saw the I-Max movie about tornadoes and let me tell you, I know that they're bigger and badder than I am. I even started bawling when I watched it. It was a life event for me, I kid you not.

Anyway, every time that the tornado sirens go off, I make him put on his scooter helmet. And then I put on some random motorcycle helmet that we own even though we've never owned a motorcycle. I then yell "WHAT??! I CAN'T HEAR IN THIS HELMET!" the entire time because it completely seals my ears shut. "ARE THE TORNADO SIRENS STILL GOING OFF? WHAT?? I SAY I CAN'T HEAR IN THIS HELMET!!" In other news...

Son of a....

The kitties have officially destroyed our beloved couch.

We did the best that we could with blankets and throws and limp-wristed discipline but a couch is no match for four demon cats from the depths of Hell. Here it was in its glory days:

Ahem, y'all. Note the tuxedo cat on the left side of that photo.

A man in a van came and took it away and is going to replace that beautiful fabric with a thick vinyl. Le sigh. You know how when you accidentally break something vintage and you think "Great. This (whatever it is) has lasted for sixty years and then I go and destroy it!"? That's the way that we feel about this couch. 

In happier news, we're finally starting to work on our patio which has been a huge mess since we moved here thanks to hackberry tree sap. The Mister discovered this amazing stuff (not the technical term but you know..) that you can put under the trees to make the sap go away. Or it kills the bugs that create the sap. We're super stoked that we might finally be able to use the patio. Well okay, for the two weeks out of the year that mosquitoes don't pick you up and carry you away if you dare go outside.  I marvel that some of you live in areas of the country where you can actually go outside for most of the year. What must that be like? 

So, I've been mother-henning some herbs and having a great time potting little plants. I didn't have quite as much fun with the power-washing of the patio and can still feel my teeth vibrating. The Mister has been cleaning and spray painting all of our old pitiful patio furniture. Funny story for you: He works at a place that has a nice spray paint booth so he has been taking our chairs there to paint them. Two college aged kids came into my husband's studio at completely different times and he said that both of them sat down in one of the patio chairs and tipped over and fell into the floor! Two separate incidents of kids just falling out like rag dolls into the floor. 

The offending chair: 

(Insert menacing music here.)

He said that they didn't seem to understand the logistics of chairs that tip to the front. What the heck is going on with kids these days when they can't sit in patio chairs?? Those damned video games have made them off-balance, that's what. Pong never did that to us. Why, we could sit in chairs AND play video games at the same time back in my day! I don't even know how to explain the lack of understanding that these kids have for patio chairs but I do know that I'm not inviting them over for any cookouts.

Did you know that I once bought a haunted chair in a thrift store? I sure did. I am going to put that on my list of stories to share with you guys soon. 

I've rambled enough for now. Join me next time when I show you one of the coolest cars ever!

Until next time,
x's and o's,


Rae - Say It Aint So said...

oh your poor couch. my cats destroyed a chair i really like so i've just been putting a blanket over the ripped up section when people come over. those damn cats!
and i have cried at an imax too! it was one about the ocean and for some reason i am TERRIFIED of sharks. the movie jaws fills me with terror for real. at the imax out of no where they show a huge shark LEAPING OUT OF THE WATER to get a seal and i just started crying. and then got laughed at. haha!
i hope you will get to use your patio! we have a pretty nice stone one but travis refuses to weed it or mow it (and i'm a delicate lady so how could I??) and it gets overgrown in may and is just a tick haven the rest of the summer.

Liz said...

Hi! Discovered your blog recently and I love it! You are a great story teller. I am glad your family is ok.

MySpecialAgent said...

A haunted chair? I had a haunted cell phone once. It would just light up and dial numbers in the wee hours of the morning. Creepy stuff. This was before the advent of "smart phones". It was creepy and annoying all in one.

linda h said...

That is why Pat Robertson says you should pray over thrift store purchases. HA said...

loved this post! so glad your brother and his family are ok!! so scary.

the chair story is hilarious!

very sad about your couch. :( can't wait to see it recovered!!

Jackie Jardine said...

Ouch. Sorry about that lovely couch, Eartha. Though I do have to own up to a brief chuckle at the tuxedo cat caught in the act in the "before" photo.

Good luck staying tornado-free in Tennessee. Things are predicted to get a bit rough in the Philadelphia area tomorrow night...but no mention of any twisters for us. Just the usual crackle and boom of the thunder.

Stay safe.
<3 Jackie @ Let's Go Thrifting

Mr. Tiny said...

Oh boy, you'd better use your patio - if only to enjoy that beautiful block wall!!! I have my grandma's sofa and it is in a similar state and I don't even have cats; it's just sad and beyond threadbare.

Lauren T said...

So glad your brother and his family are okay. Love the chair story...and the "Pong" reference...and I hope that you enjoy your patio!

Also, the picture of the black and white cat caught in the act of sofa destruction is hilarious.

Sara In AZ said...

Oh darn, your beautiful couch....that is really so sad. I'm interested to see what it looks like covered in the vinyl....knowing you it will still look amazing!!!

So sorry to hear about your brother and the fire, I am super glad to hear everything turned out OK though!

hee! The patio chair.....that is too funny! :)

linda h said...

I really like the back cushions on the sofa. Will they be reupholstered, too?

Kelli Davidson said...

You always give me a chuckle or a laugh and I enjoy visiting your page so much. I'm in Oklahoma (but I went to KUMC so I'm a Jayhawk) and like your husband, tornadoes don't scare me either. In fact, Wednesday night when the sirens began going off we went out onto the porch to see if we could SEE it! :) P.S. - that's a rockin' couch!

Matthew W. Hungate said...


Also, poor couch. I actually cracked up about the little paw in the very edge of the photo, caught red handed. Still! It's going to be even better with its new vinyl covering, don't you fret! And it's hilarious that patio chairs and college kids don't mix-- maybe their sitting-down velocity was too high! Patio chair aptitudes ain't what they usta be!

Anonymous said...

Oh my, that was an amazing couch!
:( I am glad you are going to fix it, though! De-lurking after years to say I love your blog and your fun stories! :)

Greener Pastures--A City Girl Goes Country said...

I would kill those cats. Not really. My cats are destroying my furniture too.

Love the couch. Love the whole room. Love the patio block. Looks like you're in a mid-century modern house?

OP SHOP MAMA said...

Oh no!! That is a huge bummer and maybe another reason why I don't have any pets at this stage. MY KIDS (one in particular) destroy so many things that I love. (I'm not saying they'd kill the cat, but it is possible!) I do that "I had this since I was kid you know, and you come along and totally trash it" It's quite a regular occurence sadly. Doh!!
I LOVE the photo of prstine couch + cat paw. Classic.

Haunted chair story - can't wait!

SUZY8-TRACK said...

Sorry about your sofa. I think all cat owners can feel your pain. I love that you were actually able to catch the cat in the act! Seriously cannot wait to hear the tale of the haunted chair!

Adrienne said...

We also have demon kitty cats. They have destroyed 3 of our carpeted stairs, and they will now have to be patched. Sorry about your lovely couch!

What Lola Wants

Lucky Charm Vintage said...

I recently had to send a fab 60's sectional to that showroom in the sky because my dog decided out of nowhere to tunnel his way through the fabric of both pieces. I was so sick over it! Not only was the original fabric destoyed, the springs and the frame took a hit as well.
P.S. I just love the concrete screen / fence on your patio!

Dana@Mid2Mod said...

I love that one of the kitties was caught in the act in the "before" photo!

Jen said...

Oh, I am sorry about the sofa! What a shame. And those are scratches big enough that even the extra-large ric-rack or plain ribbon trim can't hide it. :( And a fire in your brother's house! I'm so glad everyone is okay! That's nightmarish to even think about!

Also sorry to hear about the tornadoes. I don't know how you all live in the South and Southwest with NO BASEMENTS. As soon as I see nastiness might be swinging through, I start keeping tabs on where the pets are in case we need to 'evacuate', as I call it, though that only means huddling in the basement listening to our little hand-crank weather radio. Zach thinks I'm crazy, but I'm much happier taking attendance so we can grab and go! Tornadoes are nothing to mess with, that's for darned sure.

Anonymous said...

Sorry for the loss of your couch. I happen to be somewhat of a kitty supermom and I highly recommend a tall scratching post - not the kind you get at the local pet super mart - it must be tall enough for them to get a full stretch. This is why the scratch your couch, it's the right height. Try topcatproducts (dotcom) or purrfectpost (dotcom)or anything similar. Build your own even. I have six fully clawed fluffballs and they prefer these posts to my furniture. I'm not associated with either site, just trying to help so you don't go through it again. Good luck!